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孩子们吃早饭了Kids,breakfast!孩子们Kids?菲尔把他们叫下来好吗Phil,wouldyougetthem?好等一下Yeah.Justasec.孩子们Kids!-这真是-算了-Thatis-Okay.孩子们快下来Kids?Getdownhere!我们远在楼上你们喊也没用Whyareyouguysyellingatuswhenwe'rewayupstairs?-发个短信不就行了-那是不可能的-Justtextme.-Allright.That'snotgonnahappen.你不能穿这套衣服出门And,wow!You'renotwearingthatoutfit.这衣服怎么了What'swrongwithit?亲爱的对你女儿这条裙子Honey,doyouhaveanythingtosay-有什么意见吗-不好意思-toyourdaughteraboutherskirt?-Sorry.-挺可爱的嘛宝贝-谢了-Oh,yeah.Thatlooksreallycute,sweetheart.-Thanks.不行这裙子太短了No.It'swaytooshort.大家知道你是女生Peopleknowyou'reagirl.没必要穿这么少给他们看Youdon'tneedtoproveittothem.卢克又把头卡在栏杆里了Lukegothisheadstuckinthebanisteragain.我去吧婴儿油在哪儿在我们床头的我不知道你自己找It'sonourbedsidetab-Idon'tknow.Findit.拜托Comeon!菲尔&克莱尔我在成长期间简直无法无天Iwasoutofcontrolgrowingup.你看我坦白了There,youknow?Isaidit.结婚16年我只是不想让我的孩子I-Ijustdon'twantmykids...重蹈我的覆辙tomakethesamebadmistakesImade.只要海莉没有半裸着在佛罗里达沙滩上醒来I-IfHaleyneverwakesuponabeachinFlorida,half-naked,我就算完成我的任务了I'vedonemyjob.-我俩的任务-对-Ourjob.-Right.我就算完成了我俩的任务I'vedoneourjob.加油曼尼踢球啊踢啊Vamos,Manny!Kickit!Kickit!别让他踢啊Don'tlethim-Kickit!曼尼加油往右跑往右Manny,go!Aladerecha!Aladerecha!不不不要啊No!No,no.他下绊子杰怎么没人吹犯规Hetrippedhim,Jay.Where'sthepenalty?歌洛莉亚他们已经落后了6个球Gloria,they're0and6.你小点声叫喊Let'stakeitdownanotch.杰&歌洛莉亚结婚6个月我们是不同世界的人We'reverydifferent.杰来自城市Jay'sfromthecity.他的生意做得很大Hehasabigbusiness.我来自一个小山村Icomefromasmallvillage.穷困潦倒但风景怡人Verypoorbutvery,verybeautiful.我们村拥有全哥伦比亚最多的It'sthenumberonevillageinallColombiaforallthe-那个词怎么说来着What'stheword?凶杀案Murders.没错凶杀案Yes.Themurders.曼尼拦住他Manny,stophim!拦住他你可以的Stophim!Youcandoit!你真烂曼尼Damnit,Manny!教练该让那孩子下场了Comeon,coach.Yougottatakethatkidout.你想让他下场吗不如我让你下场如何Youwannatakehimout?HowaboutItakeyouout?-亲爱的-你还是操心你的儿子吧-Honey,honey.-Whydon'tyouworryaboutyourson?他整个上半场光忙着抓裤裆了Hespentthefirsthalfwithhishandinhispants!那话我6周来一直想对她说来着I'vewantedtotellheroffforthelastsixweeks.我叫歌洛莉亚·普里契特曼尼的妈妈Hi,I'mGloriaPritchett.Manny'smother.-这位是你父亲吧-她父亲?-Oh,andthismustbeyourdad.-Herdad?-是啊-不不是真搞笑-Yeah.-No,no.That'sfunny.怎么可能我是她老公Actually,no,I'mherhusband.别被外表给骗了Don'tbefooledbythe,uh-稍等片刻Givemeasecondhere.谁是乖宝宝啊是谁啊Whoisagoodgirl?Who'sthat?是谁啊Who'sthat?-她真可爱-谢谢-Oh,she'sadorable.-Oh,thankyou.你好小公主Hi,precious.Hello.我们刚从越南领养了她Uh,wejust,uh-WejustadoptedherfromVietnam.这是我们第一次带她回家Andwe'rebringingherhomeforthefirsttime,huh?她像个小天使你们夫妻俩一定很激动She'sanangel.Youandyourwifemustbethrilled.抱歉我来晚了老爹去买点心了Sorry,sorry,sorry.Daddyneededsnacks.大家在聊什么呢So,whatarewetalkingabout?我们在一起已经...5年了吧?Uh,wehavebeentogetherfor-guh,five-fiveyearsnow?我们非常想要一个孩子And,uh,wejust-wedecidedwereallywantedtohaveababy.米奇尔&卡梅隆女同性恋朋友做代孕母亲lesbianfriendstobeasurrogate,but-后来又想她们平时就够刻薄了Thenwefigured,they'realreadymeanenough.你能想象她们怀孕后会如何变本加厉吗Canyouimagineoneof'empregnant?Pregnant,no.还是算了吧想想就怕No,thankyou.Ick.你看到没大家本来在逗莉莉玩Yousawthat,right?EverybodyfawningoverLily,你一走进来他们就装作andthenyouwalkonandsuddenlyit'sall,看机上购物杂志Ooh,SkyMall.考虑买个电动领带架什么的Igottabuyamotorizedtierack.我得教育一下这帮人Allright,youknow,I'mgonnagivethespeech.千万别这么做Youarenotgivingthespeech.你还得和他们一起呆上5小时呢You'regonnabestuckwiththesepeopleforthenextfivehours.好吧你说得对我错了You'reright,you'reright.Okay.I'msorry.[CreamPuffs意为泡芙或者娘娘腔]-你看那个拿着泡芙的宝宝-好吧够了-Lookatthatbabywiththosecreampuffs.-Okay.Excuseme.不好意思Excuseme.这宝宝原本可能会在人满为患的孤儿院里成长Thisbabywouldhavegrownupinacrowdedorphanage多亏我们这些娘娘腔收养呢ifitwasn'tforusCreampuffs.-你们这些搞歧视的人-米奇尔-Andyouknowwhat?Notetoallofyouwhojudge--Mitchell!不分性别Orgender.-我为你们感到羞耻-米奇尔-Andshameonyou,-Mitchell.-你们这些狭隘愚昧的-米奇尔-yousmall-minded,ignorantfew-Mitchell!-干嘛-人家说的是泡芙-What?-She'sgotthecreampuffs.各位的耳机费我们请了Wewouldliketopayforeveryone'sheadsets.摩登家庭第一季第一集兄弟你怎么老是卡在这里面Buddy.Whydoyoukeepgettingstucklikethis?我以为这次能拔出来呢IthoughtIcouldgetoutthistime.我直说了吧他得去检查一下智商I'mjustgonnasayit.Heneedstobecheckedbyaspecialist.好了你自由了There.Befree.亚瑟王之剑拔出来了Excalibur.-今天我有朋友来家里玩-谁啊-I'mhavingafriendovertoday.-Who?-你不认识他-是个男生吗-Uh,youdon'tknowhim.-Him?Him?哇男生你会和他亲嘴吗Ooh,aboy.Yougonnakisshim?-闭嘴-别激动别激动-Shutup.-Easy.Easy.-闭嘴-你才闭嘴-Yeah,shutup!-No,youshutup!卢克和艾丽克斯你们俩出去解决好吗Luke,Alex,whydon'tyoutakeitoutside,okay?怎么解决在太阳下决斗不错吧-海莉-Fightinthesun.It'llbeanicechange.-Haley.-我逗你们玩呢-是谁要来-I'mkidding.-Who'stheboy?他叫迪兰HisnameisDylan.我还是别让他来算了Imightaswelltellhimnottocome...不然你们又得让我丢脸Becauseyouguysarejustgoingtoembarrassmeagain.亲爱的等等Sweetie,hangonasecond.你15岁了还是第一次有男生来家里You're15,andit'sthefirsttimeyou'vehadaboyover.我是有点小吃惊I'mboundtobealittlesurprised,可我不会让你丢脸的butI'mnotgonnaembarrassyou.我去给摄像机充好电Ibetterchargethecamcorder.逗你玩呢别这样也不看看我是谁I'mkidding.Comeon.Whoareyoutalkingto?我是酷老爹这是我的风格I'mthecooldad.That's-That'smything.我酷毙了我会上网I'mhip.I-IsurftheWeb.我会发短信LOL意思是癫狂笑Itext.LOL-Laughoutloud.OMG意思是饿滴神OMG-Oh,myGod.WTF意思是苦逼脸WTF-Whytheface?[WTF=WhattheFUCK意思是搞毛啊]《歌舞青春》里所有的舞我都会跳Um,youknow,IknowallthedancestoHighSchoolMusical,so-*我们现在欢聚一堂**We'reallinthistogether**没错**Yes,weare**我们都是大明星嘻唰唰嘻唰唰**We'reallstarsSomething,somethingyouknowit*-妈妈爸爸-什么事