your-actions-speak-louder

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1YourActionsSpeakLouderAPeaceCorpsstaffmemberishurriedlycalledtoatowninEthiopiatodealwithreportsthatoneofthevolunteersistreatingEthiopianslikedogs.Whatcouldthevolunteerbedoingtocommunicatethat?AvolunteerinNigeriahasgreattroublegettinganydisciplineinhisclass,anditisknownthatthestudentshavenorespectforhimbecausehehasshownnoself-respect.Howhasheshownthat?Neithervolunteeroffendedhishostswithwords.Butbothofthemwereunawareofwhattheyhadcommunicatedthroughtheirnonverbalbehavior.Inthefirstcase,thevolunteerworkingatahealthcenterwouldgointothewaitingroomandcallforthenextpatient.ShedidthisasshewouldinAmerica-bypointingwithherfingertothenextpatientandbeckoninghimtocome.AcceptableintheStates,butinEthiopiaherpointinggestureisforchildrenandherbeckoningsignalisfordogs.InEthiopiaonepointstoapersonbyextendingthearmandhandandbeckonsbyholdingthehandout,palmdown,andclosingitrepeatedly.Inthesecondcase,thevolunteerinsistedthatstudentslookhimintheeyetoshowattentiveness,inacountrywhereprolongedeyecontactisconsidereddisrespectful.WhilethemostinnocentAmerican-Englishgesturemayhaveinsulting,embarrassing,oratleastconfusingconnotationsinanotherculture,theconverseisalsotrue.IfforeignvisitorsweretobangonthetableandhissatthewaiterforserviceinaNewYorkrestaurant,theywouldbefortunateiftheywereonlythrownout.Americansmightfindforeignstudentsoverlypoliteiftheybow.Itseemseasiertoacceptthearbitrarinessoflanguage-thatdogischieninFrenchorajainYoruba-thanthedifferencesintheemotionallyladenbehaviorofnonverbalcommunication,whichinmanywaysisjustasarbitraryaslanguage.Weassumethatourwayoftalkingandgesturingisnaturalandthatthosewhodothingsdifferentlyaresomehowplayingwithnature.Thisassumptionleadstoablindnessaboutinterculturalbehavior.Andindividualsarelikelytoremainblindandunawareofwhattheyarecommunicatingnonverbally,becausethehostswillseldomtellthemthattheyhavecommittedasocialblunder.Itistruetotellpeopletheyarerude;thusthehostsgrantvisitorsaforeigner'slicense,allowingthemtomakemistakesofsocialetiquette,andtheyneverknowuntiltoolatewhichonesprovedisastrous.Anadditionalhandicapisthatthevisitorshavenotenteredthenewsettingasfreeagents,abletodetectandadoptnewwaysofcommunicatingwithoutwords.Theyareprisonersoftheirowncultureandinteractwithintheirownframework.Yetthefactremainsthatformaximumunderstandingthevisitorusingthewordsofanotherlanguagealsomustlearntousethetoolsofnonverbalcommunicationofthatculture.Nonverbalcommunication-teachingitandmeasuringeffect-ismoredifficultthanformallanguageinstruction.Butnowthatlanguagehasachieveditsproperrecognitionasbeingessentialforsuccess,theareaofnonverbalbehaviorshouldbetaughttopeoplewhowillliveinanothercountryinasystematicway,givingthemactualexperiences,awareness,sensitivity.Indeed,itistheriseinlinguisticfluencywhichnowmakesnonverbalfluencyevenmorecritical.Alinguisticallyfluentvisitormaytendtooffendevenmorethanthosewhodon'tspeakaswellifthatvisitorshowsignoranceaboutinterfaceetiquette;thenationalmayperceivethisdisparity2betweenlinguisticandnonlinguisticperformanceasadisregardforthemoresubtleaspectsofinterculturalcommunication.Becausenonverbalcuesreflectemotionalstates,bothvisitorandhostnationalmightnotbeabletoarticulatewhat'sgoingon.WhileitwouldbedifficulttomapoutallthenonverbaldetailsforeverylanguagethatPeaceCorpsteaches,onecanhopetomakevisitorsawareoftheexistenceandemotionalimportanceofnonverbalchannels.Ihaveidentifiedfivesuchchannels:kinesic,proxemic,chronemic,oculesic,andhaptic.Kinesics-movementofthebody(head,arms,legs,etc.).TheinitialexamplefromthehealthcenterinEthiopiawasaproblemcausedbyakinesicsignbeingusedwhichhaddifferentmeaningscross-culturally.Anotherexample,theAmericangestureofslittingone'sthroatimplyingI'vehaditorI'mintrouble,conveysquiteadifferentmessageinSwitzerland.ItmeansIloveyou.Americansmakenodistinctionbetweengesturingforsilencetoanadultortoachild.AnAmericanwillputonefingertothelipsforboth,whileanEthiopianwilluseonefingertoachildandfourfingersforanadult.Touseonlyonefingerforanadultisdisrespectful.Ontheotherhand,Ethiopiansmakenodistinctioningesturingtoindicateemphaticnegation.Theyshaketheirindexfingerfromsidetosidetoanadultaswellastoachild,whereasthisgestureisusedonlyforchildrenbyAmericans.Thus,ifvisitorsarenotconsciousofthemeaningofsuchbehavior,theynotonlywilloffendtheirhostsbuttheywillbeoffendedbythem.DrawinginthecheeksandholdingthearmsrigidlybythesideofthebodymeansthininAmharic.Diet-consciousAmericansfeelcomplimentediftheyaretoldthattheyareslimandsomaynaturallyassumethattotellanEthiopianfriendthisisalsocomplimentary.YetinEthiopiaandanumberofothercountries,thisistakenpejoratively,asitisthoughtbettertobeheavy-set,indicatinghealthandstatusandenoughwealthtoensurethetwo.Proxemics-theuseofinterpersonalspace.SouthAmericans,Greeks,andothersfindcomfortinstanding,sitting,ortalkingtopeopleatadistancewhichAmericansfindintolerablyclose.Wegivetheirunusualclosenessthesocialinterpretationofaggressivenessandintimacy,causingustohavefeelingsofhostility,discomfort,orintimidation.Ifwebackawaytoourgreaterdistanceofcomfort,wearep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