Roommate Conflicts新视野大学英语室友间的冲突

RoommateconflictAboutproblemsbetweenroommatesandtheirsolutionsQuestionnaire•Whatareyoudoinginthedormat10P.M?•Eating•Chatting•Sleeping•Studying10%30%35%25%•Doyousharethesamehabitwithyourroommate?•Many•Some•Less•no15%35%45%5%•Whatyoudothinkofyourdormlifeatpresent?Satisfying•Justso-so•Awful30%45%25%•Haveyoueverhadroommateconflicts?•Always•Sometimes•Seldom•Never25%35%45%5%•Whatareyouusuallyarguingfor?•Timeforsleeping•Livinghabits•Cleaning•Opinionsaboutsomething•Others15%30%15%30%10%•Whatkindofmeasurewouldyoutakewhenconflictoccurs?•Speakoutdirectly•Sendamessageore-mail•Keepitinmind•Others30%25%35%10%•Wouldyouturntoyourroommatesfirstwhenyouareintrouble?•Yes•No•Idon’tknow35%25%40%•Whatdoyouthinkaffecttheroommaterelationshipsmost?•Regions•Backgrounds•Characters•Academicrecords10%30%45%15%•Ifthereisachancetorecombinethedormmembers,wouldyoustillliketolivewiththeformerroommates?•Yes•No•Itdoesn’treallymatter20%30%50%•Whatdoyouthinkisthemostdesperateproblemtobesolveinthedorm?•Cleaning•Difficultperson•Badhabitandbehavior•Others15%25%35%15%•HOST:…•STUDENT:Therearesixpersonsinourdormitory,whichdiffersfromtheordinarydormof4.Morepeoplemeanmorecharacters,morethoughts,morehabits,andlesspersonalspace.Theinconveniencecausedbythecrowdedroomcanbereallyannoying.•GRADUATE:Thisproblemdoesexistinsomedorms.TheroomIusedtoliveisanordinaryroom.4personssharearoom.Everyonehaveadeskwhichwasenoughformetodothemostworks.•STUDENT:Thereissometimesanoddoneinadorm,whosehabits,opinionsandbehaviorareweirdandobviouslydifferentfromothers.Gradually,thatdifficultpersonwillbetheonewhoalwayshaveconflictswithothers.•GRADUATE:Thattrue.I’veeverhadaroommate.Hislifestylewasdifferentfromus,andheliketosleepearlyandgetupearly.Butforus,itwastooearly.Atthebeginning,wecanbearit,butlater,wefoundthathesnoredsoloudly,sometimeswecouldn’tatall.Itwashardbutwehavetobeasleepbeforehewenttosleep.Anotherroommatewassosensiblethathewasawakedallnigh.Therefore,theyfightforthistheotherday.•STUDENT:Thiswasarallytypicalroommateconflict.•HOST:…•HOST:…•COLLEGEINSTRUCTORS:Itisthedifferencethatmakeswhoyouare,sothateveryoneisuniqueontheearth.Dormlifeisanimportantpartofthecollegelife.Itcanaffectyouonmanyaspects,suchasyourmood,habit,ideasandsoon.Soitissignificanttoliveinharmonywiththeroommates.Nobodyhastherighttoaskotherstochangeanything,includingtherehabits.Ifyourealizethatyourbehaviormaycauseconflictinthedorm,thenyoushouldmakeachoicetohavechange.Andtrytoreducethedifferences.•PSYCHOLOGICALCOUNSELOR:Whatmakessomepeoplesoeasytorelateandotherssodifficult?Wearguethatconflictinarelationshipoccurswhentheemphasisisonthedifferences,ratherthanonthesimilarities.Thinkofitas“Unitedwestand,dividedwecan’tstandeachother.”Conflictoccurswhentheemphasisisondifference.Reducingdifferencescanturnconflictintocooperation.•COLLEGEINSTRUCTORS:Roommatesshouldhavegoodcommunicationstogetabetterunderstanding,ratherthanmakepeopleunderstandyoufirst.Whentwoormorepeoplewanttobeheardandnooneiswillingtolisten,anargumentisinevitable.Listenandunderstandfirst,andyouunlockthedoorstopeople’sminds.•PSYCHOLOGICALCOUNSELOR:Yeah,totallyright.Thisisaboutthekindofunderstandingthatwillhelpyoucommunicateeffectively,preventfutureconflictandresolvecurrentconflictbeforeitgetsoutofhand.Thekindofunderstandingthatresultswhenyoucloselyexaminethedifficultbehavioruntilyoucanseethemotivebehindit.•STUDENT:Livinginthesameroom,thereisnodoubtthatconflictswilloccur.Buttheconflictisnotamatterofprofitorbenefit.Itisalwaysaboutthebrokenpieces.Whentheconflicthappens,remembertohaveintrospection,andtrytobetolerantandgenerous.•HOST:….•AUDIENCE:Whatyousayordotopeoplecanproducedefensivenessortrust,increaseresistanceorcooperation,promoteconflictorunderstanding.Itdependsonyou.Rememberthat“communication”hasthesameoriginsas“common”:tocommunicateistoestablishacommonunderstanding.Whilecommunicating,stayflexible.Whileyoucan’tchangepeopleyoumeet,youcancommunicatewiththeminsuchawaythattheychangethemselves.It’samatterofknowinghowtogetthroughtothemwhenthey’rebehavingbadly.Iftheconflictisoutofcontrol,remembertoturntothecollegeinstructorforhelp.•GRADUATE:NoweachtimeImemorizethedayswhenIliveinthedormitory,mymindisfullofhappiness,insteadoftheconflicts.•HOST:…