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HOWIMETYOURMOTHER1X06-SLUTTYPUMPKINORIGINALAIRDATE(CBS):24-OCT-2005WRITTENBYBRENDAHSUEHDIRECTEDBYGLORIACALDERONKELLETTYEAR2030INT.LIVINGROOM(DaughterandSonsittingoncouch)FutureTed:YouknowhowAuntRobin'sabigfanofHalloween,alwaysdressingupincrazycostumes?Well,shewasn'talwaysthatway.Backin2005,shethoughtshewastoocoolforHalloween,unlikeAuntLily.INT.BAR(Presentday,Marshall,BarneyandRobinsitatbooth;Lilyentersbarandheadsovertothem)Lily:Guesswhatcameinthemailtoday?(LilysitsdownnexttoMarshall)Marshall:Ourcostumes?Dotheyrule?Lily:Theyrule.Andyoursis100%woolsoyouwon'tgethypothermialikelastyear.Marshall:Tarzannippleblue.Barney:YouknowwhatIloveaboutHalloween?It'stheonenightoftheyearchicksusetounleashtheirinnerho-bag.Ifagirldressesupassheawitch,she'sasluttywitch.Ifshe'sacat,she'sasluttycat.Ifshe'sanurse...Lily(interrupting):Wow,wegetit.Barney:She'sasluttynurse.Marshall:Robin,whatareyoudoingforHalloween?Robin:Oh,Idon'tknow.ProbablyhangingoutwithMike,thisguyI'vebeenseeing.Lily:Mike?There'saMike?Youhaveaboyfriend?Youhaven'ttoldus?Robin:No,Imean,he'snotmyboyfriend.He'sjustthisguyI'vebeenseeingforacoupleofweeks.Lily(inasing-songvoice):Boyfriend.Marshall:Sowhyhaven'twemethim?Robin:We'renotreallyreadytogopublicyet.Barney(inasing-songvoice):Married.Lily:HowaboutwegoaboutaHalloweendouble-date?Robin:Idon'tknow,wewerekindathinkingaboutstayingathomeanddressingupasnakedpeople.Lily:Comeon,Robin,trotouryournewfella.Letusjudgeandevaluatehimbehindyourback.It'llbefun.(MarshalllooksovertoseeTedapproaching)Marshall:Hey,Ted,you'llneverguesswhathappened?Ted:Yourcostumescame.Marshall:Ourcostumes...yes,thatiswhywe'rebestfriends.Robin:Hey,Ted,whatareyoudoingforHalloween?Ted:Well.Marshall,Lily,Barney:A:EveryHalloweenTedwaitsfortheSluttyPumpkin.Ted:That'sright.Robin:What'stheSluttyPumpkin?Ted:Youmean,whoistheSluttyPumpkin?Itwasfouryearsago.EXT.ROOFTOP(TedatHalloweenparty4yearsago)Ted:IwasatthisHalloweenpartyupontheroofofourbuilding.I'mabouttocallitanearlynightwhenoutofnowhereappearedthisgirlinthesexiestpumpkincostume.INT.BARRobin:Wait,howcanapumpkincostumebesexy?Ted:Itwascarvedinstrategicplaces.Ted:So,uh,we'reatthebarandIseehermixkahlua...Lily:KahluaandrootbeerMarshall:Acocktailsheinventedherself.Ted:Andshe...Barney:AndshecalledittheTootsieRoll.Lily,Marshall,Barney:BecauseittasteslikeanalcoholicTootsieRoll.Ted:Hey,canIpleasetellthisstory?Sowehadthisinstantconnection.Shegavemehernumber,butthensomething...Marshall,Lily,Barney:Somethingwentterriblywrong.Ted:Guys!Somethingwentterriblywrong.INT.APARTMENT(Halloweenfouryearsago,Lily,dressedupasSonny,ispassingoutcandyatfrontdoor)Lily:HappyHalloween.(Tedwalksinthroughfrontdoor)Ted:Sonny,where'sCher?Lily:Cher?(Marshallwalksinfromhisbedroomdressedupasawoman)Marshall:Righthere,babe.Ted:Ijustmettheperfectwoman.She'sfunny.She'sbeautiful.ShelovesStarWars.Marshall:Whoawhoawhoawhoawhoa.What'shertakeonEwoks?Ted:Lovesthem.Marshall:Ohgood.Idon'tknowwhypeoplearesocynicalaboutEwoks.TheRebellionwouldhavefailedwithouttheEwoks.Ted:Getthis,she'samarinebiologist.ShespentayearinAntarcticastudyingpenguins.Marshall:Oh,penguinsarecool,kindalikeblackandwhiteEwoks.Iapprove.Ted:Hey,where'smy,uh,KitKat?Iputitrighthereonthistable.Lily:Idon'tknow,butwehaveplentyofchocolatehere.Ted:Nonono,youdon'tunderstand.IneedthatKitKat.Shewrotehernumberonthatwrapper.Whereisit?Lily:Uh-oh.(TedrunsoutfrontdoorandchasesdownkiddressedupasDracula)Ted:Hey,Dracula.Comeon.Givemeyourcandy.Gimme!(Tedgrabskid'scandyanddumpsitonthefloor)Ted:Where'stheKitKat?Where'stheKitKat!INT.BARTed:Neverfoundhernumber,neversawheragain.ButeveryyeartheyhaveaHalloweenpartyupontheroofsothat'swhereI'llbe.Barney:Youknow,Ted,it'sbeenfouryears.Shecouldbeengagedormarriedor,Godforbid,fat.Ted:Idon'tknow,Igotafeeling.Thiscouldbetheyear.Halloweenisanightofwonderandmagic.(Lily,Marshall,andBarneygroan)Ted:OK,bringthemockery.Fine,Icantakeit.Comeon,wouldn'titbethecooleststoryeveriftheSluttyPumpkinturnedouttobemyfuturewife?Lily:Oh,ontheoffchancethatthatcouldhappen,maybeweshouldstopcallinghertheSluttyPumpkin.(Marshall,Barney,andTedmumbleinagreement)INT.APARTMENT(Tedsittingoncouchalonewithlaptop)Lily(frombedroom):Ted,isyourworldreadytoberocked?(echo)rocked-rocked-rocked.Ted:Can'twait.(MarshallandLilywalkoutintheirpirateandparrotcostumes)Marshall:So,whatdoyouthink?Lily:(repeatslikeaparrot)So,whatdoyouthink?(squawks)Ted:Wow!Marshall,youwearingeyeliner?Marshall:Oh,yeah.Weirdlyhot,right?Lily:Wearesogonnawinthecostumecontestthisyear.Marshall:Firstprize,$50giftcertificateatthebar.Ted:Andhowmuchdidyoupayforyourcostumes?Marshall:$100Lily:(likeparrot)Each.Ted:Well,Ithinkyouguyslookgreat.(Tedgetsupfromcouchandleaveslaptoponcouch)Lily:Whatareyougoingas?Oh,likeIevenhavetoask.Ted:Hey,IwanttheSluttyPumpkintorecognizemeandsheknowsmeasahangingchad.(Tedputsonhiscostumeasaballotwithahangingchad)Ted:What?Shethoughtitwashilarious.Lily:Yeah,fouryearsago,butnobodyrememberswhatthehellahangingchadis.Marshall:Whatasadcommentaryonournationalattentionspanthatwecouldforgetsuchaturbulenttimeinourpolitica