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第一季11集：ThePancakeBatterAnomaly-Sheldon:Checkmate.将军。-Leonard:Again？又？-Sheldon:Obviously，youarenotwellsuitedforthree-dimensionalchess很显然，你还不够格来玩三维国际象棋。Perhapsthree-dimensionalcandylandwouldbemoreyourspeed.你的速度或许更适合玩三维糖果盒游戏。-Leonard:Justresettheboard.这盘重来。-Sheldon:Itmustbehumblingtosuckonsomanydifferentlevels.这么多层都得我让你，还真丢脸阿。-Penny:Hey,guys,didyougetmymail好，伙计们,你拿了我的邮件了？-Leonard:Yeah,righthere是，在这。HowwasNebraska？内布拉斯加那边怎么样？-Penny:Well,betterthannorthDakota。比北达科他州强。IguessthatjobisonlyfunnyinNebraska.我猜这笑话只有在内布拉斯加州才好笑。-Sheldon:Fromthedataathand,youreallycan’tdrawthatconclusion.就目前的数据来说，你还不能得出这结论。Allyoucansaywithabsolutecertaintyisthatjokeisnotfunnyhere.你所能唯一确定的是这笑话在这儿不好笑。-Penny:Boys,it’sgoodtobeback.兄弟们，回来真好。-Leonard:How’syourfamily你家人怎么样-Penny:Itwastheworsttrip.这趟旅行简直不能再糟了。Everyonegotsickovertheweekend.一个周末下来家里人全病了。-Leonard:Sick？病了？-Sheldon:Herewego.Whatkindofsick又来了。什么病？-Penny:Theflu,Iguess.我猜，就是流感吧。-Sheldon:Idon’tneedyoutoguess.Ineedyoutoknow.我不是要你猜，我要你确定。Now,whendidthesymptomsfirstappear第一次出现症状是在什么时候？-Penny:MaybeFriday.大概是周五。-Sheldon:Friday.Wasthatmorningorafternoon周五，上午还是下午？-Penny:I-Idon’t…我…我不…-Sheldon:Think,woman,whoblewtheirnoseandwhen小姐，好好想想，是谁？在什么时候擦过鼻子？-Leonard:Sheldon,relax.没事的，Sheldon。Shedoesn’thaveanysymptoms.I’msureshe’snotcontagious.她没有任何症状，我确定她不会传染。-Sheldon:Oh,please.拜托。Ifinfluenzawasonlycontagiousaftersymptomsappear,itwouldhavediedoutthousandofyearsago.如果流感只是在症状出现后才会感染，那它早该在几千年前就消失了。Somewherebetweentoolusingandcavepainting,Homohabitswouldherefiguredouthowtokilltheguywiththerummynose.在开始使用石器工具和创作洞穴壁画的年代,能人们肯定会想方设法干掉流着鼻涕的家伙的。-Leonard:Penny,you’llhavetoexcuseSheldon.He’sabitofagermaphobe.Penny，你要原谅Sheldon，他有点病理恐惧。-Penny:It’sokay.Iunderstand.没关系，我能理解。-Sheldon:Thanksforyourconsideration,nowpleaseleave.谢谢你的照顾，现在请你离开。-Leonard:You’dbettergobeforehestartssprayingyouwithIysol.你最好趁他还没拿来沙尔来对着你喷的时候赶紧闪。-Penny:Okay,well,thankyouforgettingmymail.好的，谢谢你替我拿邮件。-Leonard:Noproblem.Welcomehome.小意思，欢迎回家。-Sheldon:What怎么了？-Leonard:Whatthehellareyoudoing你在瞎折腾什么啊-Sheldon:I'mmakingpetridishestogrowthroatcultures.我在进行咽拭子培养-Leonard:WithlimeJell-O用酸橙果冻-Sheldon:Ineedagrowthmedium,andsomeonepolishedofftheapricotyogurt.我需要一个生长培养基，而杏仁酸奶却被扫荡一空。-Sheldon:Here,swabmythroat.过来，取一下我喉咙的样本。-Leonard:Idon'tthinkso.我不要。-Sheldon:Leonard,ifI'mgoingtogetaheadofthisthing,Ineedtofindoutwhat'sgrowinginmythroat.Leonard如果我要防患于未然，就得先知道我喉咙里长了些什么-Leonard:Sheldon,youarenotsick.Thisis,butyouarenot.Sheldon你没生病.这实在是...不过你真没得病。-Sheldon:WehavenoideawhatpathogenTyphoidPennyhasintroducedintoourenvironment.我们不知道Penny会把哪种伤寒病菌带进来。ForhavingneverbeentoNebraska,I'mfairlycertainthatIhavenocorn-huskingantibodies.我从没有去过内布拉斯加州,我很确定我身体里没有那种病菌的抗体。-Leonard:Sheldon,don'tyouthinkyou'reoverreactingSheldon你没觉得你过度紧张了么？-Sheldon:WhenI'mlyingcomatoseinahospitalrelyingoninferiormindstocureme,theseJell-Oculturesandmyaccompanyingnoteswillgivethemafightingchance.在我躺在医院不省人事，要靠那些庸医来救我时，这些果冻样本和我随身的笔记多少会提高点我活命的机率。-Leonard:I'mgoingbacktobed.我要去睡觉了。-Sheldon:Wait.Putthisinthebathroom.等等，把这个拿到洗手间去。-Leonard:Whatfor干嘛用-Sheldon:Ineedtomeasuremyfluidintakeandoutputtomakesuremykidneysaren'tshuttingdown.我要记录我体内水分的摄入和流失来确认我的肾脏功能是否良好。-Leonard:Imixedpancakebatterinthis!我用这个来搅拌做薄煎饼的材料!-Sheldon:No,thatmeasuringcuphasalwaysbeenforurine.不，这量杯向来都是用来盛尿的。-Leonard:Youhadtimetomakealabelforeverythinginthisapartmentincludingthelabelmaker,butyoudidn'thavetensecondstomakeonethatsaidurinecup你有空把房间里所有东西都贴上标记，甚至包括记号笔，怎么就不腾出10秒在这上面写尿杯-Sheldon:It'srighthereonthebottom.我写了，就在杯底。-Leonard:Huh.IguessIowetheBettyCrockerCompanyaletterofapology.Huh，我想我欠贝蒂厨房一封致歉信。-Sheldon:Oh,dearGod.Leonard!天哪Leonard!Leonard,I'msick!Leonard我病了!Leonard,mycomforterfelldown,andmysinuseshurtwhenIbendover.Leonard我毯子掉地上了，而且我弯腰时鼻窦疼。-Sheldon:Leonard,whereareyouLeonard你在哪-Leonard:I'matwork.我在上班。-Sheldon:At6:30inthemorning早上6点半-Leonard:Yes.是啊。-Sheldon:OnSunday星期天-Leonard:Yes.是啊。-Sheldon:Why为什么-Leonard:Theyaskedmetocomein.他们让我加班。-Sheldon:Ididn'thearthephonering.我怎么没听到电话响。-Leonard:Theytextedme.他们发消息给我的。-Sheldon:Well,asIpredicted,Iamsick.正如我预测，我病了。Myfeverhasbeentrackingupexponentiallysince2:00a.m.,andIamproducingsputumatanalarmingrate.我体温从早上2点钟开始持续上升，而且我的痰也多到警戒水平了。-Leonard:Nokidding不是吧-Sheldon:Nonotonlythat,ithasshiftedfromcleartomilkygreen.痰还从透明色变成了奶绿色.-Leonard:Allright,well,getsomerestanddrinkplentyoffluids.那好吧,好好休息,多喝点东西。-Sheldon:WhatelsewouldIdrink,gases,solids,ionizedplasma我能喝什么汽油固体还是血浆-Leonard:Drinkwhateveryouwant.爱喝什么喝什么。-Sheldon:Iwantsoup.我要喝汤。-Leonard:Thenmakesoup.那就去做呀。-Sheldon:Wedon'thavesoup.我们这没汤。-Leonard:I'matwork,Sheldon.我在上班呢，Sheldon。-Sheldon:Isthatadog是狗在叫吗-Leonard:Yes.是啊-Sheldon:Inthelab在实验室-Leonard:Yes.是啊They'retrainingdogstooperatethecentrifugeforwhentheyneeddogstooperatethecentrifugeforblindscientists.他们在训练狗用离心机，因为他们想让狗帮盲人科学家操纵这机器。Ihavetogo.我得挂了。-OldLady:Howard,it'sthephone!Howard是电话在响!-Howard:Iknowit'sthephone,Ma,Ihearthephone!我是电话在响,妈,我听到它在响!-OldLady:Well,who'scallingatthisungodlyhour!谁有病在这个时候打来!-Howard:Idon'tknow!我怎么知道!-OldLady:Well,askthemwhythey'recallingatthisungodlyhour!那就快接问问为什么这时候打!-Howard:HowcanIaskthemwhenI'mtalkingtoyou