11TheredroomWecouldnotgoforawalkthatafternoon.Therewassuchafreezingcoldwind,andsuchheavyrain,thatweallstayedindoors.Iwasgladofit.Ineverlikedlongwalks,especiallyinwinter.Iusedtohatecominghomewhenitwasalmostdark,withice-coldfingersandtoes,feelingmiserablebccauseBessie,thenursemaid,wasalwaysscoldingme.AllthetimeIknewIwasdifferentfrommycousins,Eliza,JohnandGeorgianaReed.Theyweretallerandstrongerthanme,andtheywereloved.Thesethreeusuallyspenttheirtimecryingandquarrelling,buttodaytheyweresittingquietlyaroundtheirmotherinthesitting-room.Iwantedtojointhefamilycircle,butMrsReed,myaunt,refusedBessiehadcomplaintedaboutme.'No,I'msorry,Jane.UntilIhearfromBessie,orseeformyself,thatyouarereallytryingtobehavebetter,youcannotbetreatedasagood,happychild,likemychildren.''WhatdoesBessiesayIhavedone?'Iasked.'Jane,itisnotpolitetoquestionmeinthatway.Ifyoucannotspeakpleasantly,bequiet.'2Icreptoutofthesitting-roomandintothesmallroomnextdoor,whereIchoseabookfullofpicturesfromthebookcase.Iclimbedontothewindow-seatanddrewthecurtains,sothatIwascompletelyhidden.Isatthereforawhile.SometimesIlookedoutofthewindowatthegreyNovemberafternoon,andsawtherainpouringdownontheleaflessgarden.ButmostofthetimeIstudiedthebookandstared,fascinated,atthepictures.Lostintheworldofimagination,Iforgotmysad,lonelyexistenceforawhile,andwashappy,Iwasonlyafraidthatmysecrethiding-placemightbediscovered.Suddenlythedooroftheroomopened.JohnReedrushedin.'Whereareyou,rat?'heshouted.Hedidnotseemebehindthecurtain.'Eliza!Georgy!Janeisn'there!TellMammashe'srunoutintotherain—whatabadanimalsheis!''HowluckyIdrewthecurtain,'Ithought.Hewouldneverhavefoundme,becausehewasnotveryintelligent.ButElizaguessedatoncewhereIwas.'She'sinthewindow-seat,John,'shecalledfromthe3sitting-room.SoIcameoutimmediately,asIdidnotwanthimtopullmeout.'Whatdoyouwant?'Iaskedhim.'Say,“Whatdoyouwant,MasterReed”,'heanswered,sittinginanarmchair.'Iwantyoutocomehere.'JohnReedwasfourteenandIwasonlyten.Hewaslargeandratherfat.Heusuallyatetoomuchatmeals,whichmadehimill.Heshouldhavebeenatboardingschool,buthismother,wholovedhimverymuch,hadbroughthimhomeforamonthortwo,becauseshethoughthishealthwasdelicate.Johndidnotlovehismotherorhissister,andhehatedmeHebulliedandpunishedme,nottwoorthreetimesaweek,notonceortwiceaday,butallthetime.Mywholebodytrembledwhenhecamenear.Sometimeshehitme,sometimeshejustthreatenedme,andIlivedinterriblefearofhim.Ihadnoideaabouthowtostophim.Theservantsdidnotwanttooffendtheiryoungmaster,andMrsReedcouldseenofaultinherdearboy.SoIobeyedJohn'sorderandapproachedhisarmchair,thinkinghowveryuglyhisfacewas.Perhapshe4understoodwhatIwasthinking,forhehitmehardontheface.'ThatisforyourrudenesstoMammajustnow,'hesaid,'andforyourwickednessinhiding,andforlookingatmelikethat,yourat!'IwassousedtohisbullyingthatIneverthoughtofhittinghimback.'Whatwereyoudoingbehindthatcurtain?'heasked.'Iwasreading,'Ianswered.'Showmethebook.'Igaveittohim.'Youhavenorighttotakeourbooks,'hecontinued.'Youhavenomoneyandyourfatherleftyornone.Yououghttobeginthestreets,notlivehereincomfortwithagentleman'sfamily.Aayway,allthesebooksaremine,andsoisthewholehouse,orwillbeinafewyears'time.I'llteachyounottoborrowmybooksagain.'Heliftedtheheavybookandthrewithardatme.IthitmeandIfell,cuttingmyheadonthedoor.Iwasingreatpain,andsuddenlyforthefirsttimeinmylife,IforgotmyfearofJohnReed.'Youwicked,cruelboy!'Icried.'Youareabully!Youareasbadasamurderer!'5'What!What!'hecried.'Didshesaythattome?Didyouhear,ElizaandGeorgiana?I'lltellMamma,butfirst…'Herushedtoattackme,butnowhewasfightingwithadesperategirl.Ireallysawhimasawickedmurderer.Ifeltthebloodrunningdownmyface,andthepaingavemestrength.IfoughtbackashardasIcould.Myresistancesurprisedhim,andheshoutedforhelp.HissistersranforMrsReed,whocalledhermaid,MissAbbott,andBessie.TheypulledusapartandIheardthemsay,'Whatawickedgirl!SheattackedMasterJohn!'MrsReedsaidcalmly,'Takeherawaytotheredroomandlockherinthere.'AndsoIwascarriedupstairs,armswavingandlegskicking.Assoonaswearrivedintheredroom,Ibecamequietagain,andthetwoservantsbothstartedscoldingme.'Really,MissEyre,'saidMissAbbott,'howcouldyouhithim?He'syouryoungmaster!''Howcanhebemymaster?Iamnotaservant!'Icried.'No,MissEyre,youarelessthanaservant,becauseyoudonotwork,repliedMissAbbott.Theybothlookedatmeas6iftheystronglydisapprovedofme.'Youshouldremember,miss,'saidBessie,'thatyourauntpaysforyourfoodandclothes,andyoushouldbegrateful.Youhavenootherrelationsorfriends.'AllmyshortlifeIhadbeentoldthis,andIhadnoanswertoit.Istayedsilent,listeningtothesepainfulreminders.'Andifyouareangryandrude,MrsReedmaysendyouaway,'addedBessie.'Anyway,'saidMissAbbott,'Godwillpunishyou,JaneEyre,foryourwickedheart.PraytoGod,andsayyou'resorry.'Theylefttheroom,lockingthedoorcarefullybehindthem.Theredroomwasacold,silentroom,hardlyeverused,althoughitwasoneofthelargestbedroomsinthehouse.Nineyearsago,myuncle,MrReed,haddiedinthisroom,andsincethennobodyhadwantedtosleepinit.NowthatIwasaloneIthoughtbitterlyofthepeopleIlivedwith.JohnReed,hissisters,hismother,theservants,theyallaccusedme,scoldedme,hatedme.WhycouldIne