搜索
Scriptcompiledby„TheBigBangTheory“fans!THEBIGBANGTHEORYbyChuckLorre&BillPradySeason2,Episode23(s02e23)Title:TheMonopolarExpedition---Dialogonly---SHELDONOh,boy.LEONARDWhat?SHELDONIcan'tcommentwithoutviolatingouragreementthatInotcriticizeyourwork.LEONARDThenwhatwas„Oh,boy“?SHELDONGreatrestraintonmypart.LEONARDThere'snothingwrongwiththesciencehere.SHELDONPerhapsyoumeanadifferentthingthanIdowhenyousay„science.“LEONARDOkay,how'sthat?SHELDONYouactuallyhaditrightinthefirstplace.Onceagain,you'vefallenforoneofmyclassicpranks.Buzzinga.Well,now,here'sapeculiare-mail.Thepresidentoftheuniversitywantsmetomeethimathisofficetomorrowmorningat8:00a.m.LEONARDWhy?SHELDONItdoesn'tsay.Itmustbeanemergency.EveryoneattheuniversityknowsIeatbreakfastat8:00andmovemybowelsat8:20.LEONARDYes,howdidwelivebeforeTwitter?Iguessyou'llfindoutwhatitisinthemorning.SHELDONThat's14hoursaway.Forthenext840minutes,I'meffectivelyoneofHeisenberg'sparticles.IknowwhereIamorIknowhowfastI'mgoing,butIcan'tknowboth.YethowamIsupposedtocarryonwiththishugeannoyingthinghoveringovermyhead?LEONARDYeah,Iknowthefeeling.============================================THEMESONG===========================================SHELDONLeonard.Leonard.Leonard.LEONARDSheldon,it's2:00inthemorning.SHELDONWhyiseverybodykeeptellingmewhattimeitis?LEONARDEverybody?SHELDONYou,thepresidentoftheuniversity,hiswife,theirsullenteenagedaughter.Thatentirefamilyisfascinatedbywhattimeitisandwhetherpeopleknowit.LEONARDYouwenttoPresidentSeibert'shouseinthemiddleofthenight?SHELDONHedidn'trespondtomye-mail,hisphonenumberisunlisted.Tellmewhatmyotheroptionwas.LEONARDYoucouldhavewaiteduntilmorning.Iknow,lookwhoI'mtalkingto.SHELDONDoyourememberthegrantproposalIsubmittedtotheNationalScienceFoundationtodetectslow-movingmonopolesatthemagneticnorthpole?LEONARDHardlyadaygoesbywhenIdon'tthinkaboutit.SHELDONOh,hownice.Well,aspaceopenedupatthelastminuteontheNSFexpeditiontotheArcticCircle.LEONARDWaitaminute.HeofferedtosendyoutotheNorthPole?SHELDONYes.Infact,hewasquiteenthusiastic.Hesaid,„Frankly,ifIcouldsendyoutonight,Iwould.“LEONARDOkay,well,doyouwannago?SHELDONOfcoursenot.I'matheoreticalphysicist.AcareerIchoseinnosmallpartbecauseit'sindoors.ButifI'mabletodetectslow-movingmagneticmonopolesthere,I'llbethescientistoconfirmstringtheory.Peoplewillwritebooksaboutme.Thirdgraderswillcreatemacaroni-artdioramasdepictingscenesfrommylife.LEONARDSure,maybeatableauofmetryingtopummelyoutodeath.SHELDONSarcasm?LEONARDMaybe.SHELDONI'monthehornsofadilemma.Canyouimagineme,SheldonCooper,attheNorthPole?LEONARDEasypeasy.I'mdoingitrightnow.SHELDONI'mnotgoodwithcold,Leonard.HowoftenhavewehadtoleaveamovietheaterbecauseIgotaheadachefromdrinkingtheIceetoofast?Ican'tgo.LEONARDThendon'tgo.SHELDONHowcanyousaythat?Thescientificopportunityofalifetimepresentsitselfandmybestfriendsays„Don'tgo.“LEONARDAllright,thengo.SHELDONListentoyou.HowcanIpossiblygo?LEONARDSheldon,whatarethewordsIcansayrightnowtoendthisconversationandletmegobacktosleep?SHELDONOdd.PresidentSeibertposedtheexactsamequestion.LEONARDHowwasitresolved?SHELDONItwasn't.Hiswifesettheirdogsonmeandrenderedthequestionmoot.HOWARDJustimagine.Ifhesaysyes,we'llhaveanentiresummerwithoutSheldon.RAJESHWecouldplayoutside.HOWARDWecouldsitontheleftsideofthecouch.LEONARDIcouldusethebathroomat8:20.RAJESHOurdreamsareverysmall,aren'tthey?SHELDONGoodnews,gentlemen,Ihavetentativelyaccepted...LEONARD,HOWARD,RAJESHYeah!SHELDON...theinvitationtojointheArcticExpedition.LEONARDIt'snotgonnabethesamewithoutyou.HOWARDWe'regonnamissyou.SHELDONThankyou,butyoursentimentsmaybepremature.RAJESHOh,Idon'tlikewherethisisgoing.SHELDONIwouldliketopropose...thatthethreeofyouaccompanyme.HOWARDTotheNorthPole?SHELDONYes.RAJESHIsthisjustsowewon'ttouchyourstuffwhileyou'reaway?SHELDONI'lladmitthatwasaconcern.Butthefactis,I'llneedasupportteam.Andthethreeofyouaremyfirstchoice.HOWARDReally?SHELDONWell,thereareotherswhomightbemorequalified,butthethoughtofinterviewingthemgavemeastomachache.Now,IknowI'mproposinganenormousundertaking,sowhydon'tyoutakeafewmomentstodiscussit?HOWARDWe'renotreallygonnagototheNorthPolewithhim,arewe?SHELDONI'mstillwithinearshot.Youmaywannawaitformydoortoclose.HOWARDWe'renotreallygonnagototheNorthPolewithhim,arewe?LEONARDHangon.Let'stalkaboutit.ThisisaNationalScienceFoundationexpedition.Idon'tknowhowwecanturnitdown.HOWARDEasy.Insteadofsaying,„No,wedon'twannagoonanNSFexpedition,“say,„No,wedon'twannaspendthreemonthsstuckinacabinintheArcticCirclewithananalnutbag.“RAJESHButifwewerepartoftheteamthatconfirmedstringtheory,wecoulddrinkforfreeinanybarinanycollegetownwithauniversitythathasastrongscienceprogram.LEONARDHoward,thisisbigscience.Youcouldbetheengineerwhobuildstheequipmentthatputsusonthecoverofmagazines.HOWARDIcouldalsobetheengineerwhobuildsthecrossbowthatkillsSheldon.RAJESHYoustillmightgetonamagazine.HOWARDSoyouguysareseriouslyconsideringthis?LEONARDYes.HOWARDAndyouthinkyoucanputupwithSheldon?RAJESHWell,I'maHindu.Myreligionteachesthatifwesufferinthislifewearerewarded