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DifferencesofFamilyValuesBetweenChinaandAmericaAbstract:ThispapertriestomakeacomparisonofdifferentfamilyvaluesbetweenChinaandUS,whichappearedinmanyfields,forinstance,theAmericanemphasistheindividualismbutChinesefocusonthecollectivism,therelationshipbetweenfamilymembersandtheirattitudestoeachotherarealsoquitedifferent,thelifestyleinfluencedbyfamilyvaluesarevaried.Reasonsforthesedifferencesarecomplex,includingdifferentcustoms,culturesandsocialbackgroundsandsoon.Keywords:familyvalues,lifestyles,cultures,differences.Ⅰ.IntroductionFamilyisthemostbasicunitofallhumansociety.Itreflectstheethicalvaluesofasociety,itsculturalcharacteristicsandtheuniquefeaturesofanation.Peoplebegintolearnanythingabouttheworldandtheirculturethroughthefamilytheyarebroughtupin.Whatyouthink,howyouact,evenyourlanguage,arealltransmittedthroughthefamilyfromthewiderculturalcontext.Familyvaluesarethecoreintheresearchofculturalvalues,andithasahugeinfluenceonpeople’sthoughtsandbehaviors.Soifwewanttogetaglimpseoftheculturesoftwodifferentcountries,itisnecessarytoknowtheirdifferentfamilyvalues.Inthispaperwewillanalyzefamilyvaluesfromdifferentaspects,includingthedecisivefamilyvalues,theattitudetothefamilymembersandtheirrelationships,andtheinfluencesoffamilyvalues.Ⅱ.Thedifferencesoffamilyvalues.A.TheindividualismVS.thecollectivismTheAmericanemphasizethepersonalindependence,whileChineseemphasizeonthewholefamily,notanyindividualmember.ChildreninAmericahavemorefreedomthanthatinChina.Theirparentsrarelyinterferewiththeirprivateaffairs,andusuallytrytoenhancechildren’sall-aroundabilitieswhentheyareyoung.Theyhandletheirownaffairsthemselvesandtrytogetsupportfromtheircolleaguesorexpertswhoworkintherelevantfield,andtheirfamilymembersonlygivesuggestionstothem.Thekeypointofitssocietyisfreedom.Obviously,weChinesepaymoreattentiontotheinterestofwholefamilythanthatofanyindividual’s.InChina,childrenusuallylivewiththeirparentsevenaftertheyaregrown-up,sinceChinesepeoplewantamoreunitedfamilyandcloserrelationshipbetweenfamilymembers.ThelivingstyleinChinaisdifferentcomparedwiththatinAmerica.Chinesepeopleliketolivewiththeirparentsandtheythinkthiskindoflivingstylemayhelpthemhavemoreopportunitytounderstandotherfamilymembers.Thiskindoflivingstylecannarrowthegapbetweenfamilymembersandwhenanybodyfaceswithaproblem,theotherscanhelphimeffectivelyandefficiently.ThelivingstylealsoreflectsthatChinesepeoplemainlyemphasizethewholefamilybutnottheindividuals,whichisquitedifferentfromAmericans.B.TheattitudetothefamilymembersandtheirrelationshipsinChinaandAmerica.Chinesepeoplehaveabigfamilywithvarietyofrelatives,whichmaybeeasytocausecompetitionandsuspicion.Soinordertomaintainorderandfamilyharmony,theyparticularlyadvocateshowingrespecttotheirseniorityinthelightofthetheoryoflawanddisciplineriteofConfucius.And'Actyourolewell'isthekeytoaharmoniousfamilyrelationship.Allthefamilymembersshouldberankedstrictlyandaccordingtotheirpositioninthefamilyhierarchytheywouldbetreatedseparatelyandberequiredtodowhattheyshoulddo.SointraditionalChinesefamily,theelderishighlyrespected.Parentsbringuptheirchildren,thenafterparentsaregettingold,itistheirchildren’sresponsibilityanddutytocareforthemandgivethembothmaterialandspiritualsupport.InthetraditionalChinesefamily,fatherwasalwaysthecentre.Itisnotbecausethefeudalconceptthatmanissuperiortowoman,butalsoforwhatmanhasearnedisthemainsourceoffamily’sincomingandusuallymanearnsmoremoneythanwoman.Andwomanisresponsibleforthefamilyhouseworking.Thoughmosthouseholdaffairsaresolvedanddecidedbymother,themostimportantthingrelatedtothewholefamilyaredeterminedbyfather.Betweenparentsandchildren,parentsaregivenmoreprivilegeandrighttocontroltheirchildren.TomostChineseparents,agoodchildmeanstobeobedientanddocile.Itisnormalforparentstoarrangeeverythingfortheirchildren.ToAmericans,itisnormalthatparentsandchildrenareseparate;reunionisabnormal.Parentsbringupchildrenandthechildrencontinuetoraisetheoffspring,sotheagedisexpelledtothesociety.Fortheattitudetobringupthechildren,Americanparentsconsiderthattheyhavethelegalliability,butinasense,thechildrenshouldtakeresponsibilityfortheirbehaviors.Americanssniffattheconceptoffilialpietyandthinkitrestrainstheirself-awarenessandego-development.Parentsandtheirchildrendon'tneeddependencyrelationship.Incontrast,theyshouldestablishakindofallowancesystemsoastoinstillthebasicconceptofself-dignityandself-loveintotheirchildren.Asaresult,althoughchildrenwouldbegratefulfortheirparents'favors,theydonotthinktheyhavetheobligationtopayback.InAmerica,iftheparentsstilllivetogetherwiththeiradultchildren,theyshouldpayboardwagesandaccommodationfeetochildren.Andthesametotheiradultchildrenwhostilllivewiththeirparents.TheprimarypurposeofanAmericanfamilyistoadvancethehappiness,theequalityandthefreedomofeveryfamilymember.Americanspraiseself-centeredanddealwiththefamilymembersandfamilyaffairsrationally.Forthesakeofthemselves,theydeemthatfamilyshouldmakesacrifice.Family’shonorandunityarelessimportantthanthatinChinesesociety.InanAmericanfamily,thedemocraticideaofequalityispreva