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英语短剧剧本-守株待兔（开始。树)上台安静地屹立到舞台较后方。导演走到台前]导演：Action![跑下台][农夫冷酷地上。]农夫：I’mafarmer.(稍停顿)[走两步]Amodernfarmer.(掏出墨镜戴上)[冷酷地走两步，突然被绊了一跤，回头生气地踢了下绊自己的石头，继续保持冷酷]WhenIwasyong,IstudiedinNan~tongMiddleSchool[掏出胸卡骄傲地展示给观众看，收起]!SoI’mrichnow![开始展示名牌，边说边掏]Look!Thisismymodernmobile——MotorolaWC250!ThisismySwatch!ThismyMP3!Thisismyshoes——ADI~DAS!Thisis…[不经意地掏出一个苹果]Oh,sorry.Andlookatthis![从怀里掏出痒痒挠]DoUknowwhat’sthis?痒痒挠?Nonono~~It’smymodern——锄头~!![看下表]It’stimetodosomefarming![开始弯下腰做出锄地的动作，锄了两下，突然]Ohyes!Ithinkfarmingshouldbecombinedwithmusic![掏出MP3戴上，开始很有激情地边锄地边唱]Farmingfarming,I’mfarming!Farmingshouldbecombinedwithmusic~!Farmingfarming,I’mfarming!Farmingwillbefunnyandeasy~![边唱边锄边慢慢下台，把没用的道具拿走，把有用的道具准备在口袋里][树走上前台]树：I’matree!Icandomanythings!Icansing![做出疯狂摇滚歌手的动作，边做边唱：哼哼哈西!!!]Icandance![跳四小天鹅]I’mtall!AndI’mStrong!IFyouhitme,youwill挂掉!Oh?Therecomesarabbit![引导观众看兔子A)。树站回后台][兔子A上]兔子A(一开始不知道状况。以为自己扮演周杰伦，所以很热情地上场跟观众打招呼)：Heyeverybody,I’mJay!IloveU!IloveNantong![展示新专辑《十一月的肖邦》]NowletmesingoneofmynewsongstoU!Thenameofthesongis《发如雪》![清清嗓子正要唱，这时候导演(范冰)上]导演：[拿手中纸筒狠狠打了下兔子A的头]WhatareUdoing?!NowUarearabbit,understand?![兔子A：Sorrysorrysorry][导演边说边夺过《十一月的肖邦》。导演下台之前，看了下《十》]What’sthis?[看了看，惊喜地]Oh!It’smine!(很兴奋地拿着下场)兔子A：OK,nowI’marabbit.Ijusthadmybreakfast.NowI’mjustwalkingaroundhere.Ithinkwalkingaftermealsisgoodformyhealth.[在场上转圈，悠闲散步][农夫继续锄地，边锄边上场，突然看见前面有个兔子]农夫：(惊喜地)Lunch![扔掉痒痒挠]Iwillcatchit![偷偷摸摸地跟到兔子后面走][农夫跟在兔子后面。两个人走啊走。兔子突然回头。农夫假装看手表。两人继续走。兔子回头。农夫假装看天气。两人继续走。兔子回头。农夫假装打手机。两人继续走，兔子回头。这次农夫冷酷地把枪口对准了兔子。]兔子A：Wahhhh~!(吓一跳)What’sthis!农夫：Hnnnn…!IwillkillUforlunch!兔子A：Butyourgun…[帮农夫把枪头调转过来(农夫一开始把枪对着自己)]农夫：Thankyou!兔子A：Mypleasure.(突然想起来农夫要杀自己)Wah~~~~~~[兔子跑，躲到树后面，农夫追到树前]农夫：Where~togo?Haha![农夫开了一枪“砰”。兔子在树后惊慌躲闪，没被打到。树做出受伤中弹状。农夫又开枪，同上。农夫开始加快频率，火力密集地开枪。兔子开始时惊慌躲闪，躲着躲着跳起舞来。树继续痛苦中弹状。]兔子A[自我陶醉中，边跳边说]Youdidn’thurtme!Youdidn’thurtme!树：[痛苦万分地]But…U…Hurtme….[痛苦地慢慢挪动到兔子背后][兔子继续兴奋地跳舞。农夫停止开枪，走到兔子面前，看着它。兔子猛然抬头发现]农夫：Ahha~!Byebye![举枪对准兔子，开枪，没声音，看看枪，示意没子弹了。兔子见状，非常兴奋地大笑起来]兔子A：Hahahaha!Youcan’tkillmenow![兴奋大笑，笑到抽筋，笑到后仰。突然头撞倒了后面的树]Wa![兔子晕两下~~“我倒!”倒地]农夫：OH![很兴奋地过去两个手指提起兔子]Mylunch,Icaughtyou!!![想一下]ButI’mstillfullnow.Letmetieittothetreeandhaveasleep.Iwilleatitaftersleeping.[把兔子绑到树上。倒地睡到树旁边]……兔子A：[兔子很快醒了，看看四周，发现自己被绑了，很惊讶]WhereamI?Whathappened?树：[指着农夫]Hecaughtyouandwantedtoeatyou.兔子A：What?!Imustleavehere!ButhowcanIescape?[东张西望，看到农夫的手机][兔子不知不觉地把树杈移开，走到手机前看了看]咦?What’sthis?[捡起来看]Oh,amobile.[再看]It’sbeautiful.[放回原处。又自觉地把自己绑在树上。突然想起来]Amobile!MaybeIcancallsomeonetohelpme![又不知不觉地把自己放出来，那起手机]Buthowtouseit???树：[走上前]LetmetellU.Look,pressthisbutton![给兔子]兔子A：OhIsee.[做出打电话的样子]喂?李咏：[上台，激情澎湃地]Hello!Thisisluckyfifty-two![做出幸运52的手势]I’mLiyong!Nowlet’sstartourfirstquestion!What’sthemostprobablerelationbetween康熙and雍正?A.HusbandandwifeB.TeacherandstudentC.WaiterandcostomerAnswerme,please!兔子A：(很冷漠地)Sorry，wrongnumber.[挂掉]李咏：Answerme!Answerme!En..?喂?喂喂?[很郁闷地下台]兔子A：Nowletmecallagain.[拨打]喂?兔子B：喂?兔子A：HeyJackey!兔子B：Heytommy!兔子A：Howareyoudoing?兔子B：Fine,thankyou.AndU?兔子A：I’mfinetoo!Howareyourparentsdoing?兔子B：Theyarefine,thankyou.AndU?兔子A：Theyarefine,too!Howisyouruncledoing?兔子B：He’sfine,thankyou!AndU?兔子A：He’sfine,too!兔子B：Butwhydoyoucallme?Ifyouwantborrowsomemoneyfromme…NOWAY!!!兔子A：Nonono!I’mindangernow!Comeandhelpme!!!兔子B：Butwhereareyou?兔子A：I’munderatree!兔子B：[边打电话边在附近走，经过兔子A面前，两个人还没发现]Whatcanyouseearoundyou?兔子A：Iseearabbit,ratherlikeyou!兔子B：Arabbit…ratherlikeme…OK!I’llsooncome!Waitforme!Iwillhelpyou![匆匆离开][兔子A打完电话，小心翼翼地把手机放回农夫处，还很有礼貌地说了句“Thankyou.”然后又很自觉地把自己绑回了树上]兔子A：Hahaha!Myfriendwillcomeandsaveme,yeah![兴奋过度，后仰，头又撞倒树上，昏眩中…“我晕!”又晕了