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2020年5月浙江省杭州高级中学高三第二次模拟考试英语作文读后续写写作指导一、续写原题OldManDonovanwasameanmanwhohatedchildren.Hethrewrocksatthemandevenshotatthemwithashotgun.Atleastthat'swhatwehadheard.Hissmallfarmborderedourneighborhoodwheremyyoungersister,LeighAnn,andIlivedwhenweweregrowingup.Hisfarmwaslong,narrow,andquaint.Itheldtwotreasures.Onewashisbeautifulfruit.Thereweremanyvarietiesoffruit:pears,apples,andlotsmoreIjustcan'tthinkof.Thefruitnaturallydrewthechildrentohisland.Itmadethemintothieves.ButmysisterandIdidn'tdaretotakehisfruitbecauseofthehorriblerumorswehadheardaboutOldManDonovan.Onesummerday,wewereplayinginanearbyfield.Itwastimetoheadbackhome.MysisterandIwerefeelingverydaringthatday.TherewasashortcuttoourhousethatwentthroughtheDonovanfarm.Wethoughthewouldn'tbeabletoseeusrunacrosshispropertyaroundthelusciousfruittrees.Wewerealmostthroughthefarmwhenweheard,Hey,girl!inagruff,lowvoice.Westoppeddeadinourtracks!Therewewere,facetofacewithOldManDonovan.Ourkneeswereshaking.Wehadvisionsofrockspoundingourbodiesandbulletspiercingourhearts.Comehere,hesaid,reachinguptooneofhisappletrees.Stillshaking,wewentovertohim.Heheldoutseveralripe,juicy,redapples.Takethesehome,hecommanded.Wetooktheappleswithsurprisedheartsandranallthewayhome.Ofcourse,LeighAnnandIatetheapples.Astimewenton,weoftenwentthroughOldManDonovan'sfarm,andhekeptongivingusmorelusciousfruit.Oneday,westoppedbytoseehimwhenhewasonhisfrontporch.Wetalkedtohimforhours.Whilehewastalking,werealizedthatwehadfoundtheotherhiddentreasure:thesweet,kindhearthiddenbehindhisgruffvoice.Soon,hewasoneofourfavoritepeopletotalkto.Unfortunately,hisfamilyneverseemedtoenjoyourcompany.Theyneversmiledorwelcomedusin.注意：1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右；2.应使5个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词语；3.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；4.续写完成后,请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。Paragraph1:Everysummer,wewouldvisitMr.Donovanandtalktohim.Paragraph2:Thenextwinter,wordgotaroundthatOldManDonovanhaddied.二、下水思路1.确定主题：大主题是人与人的关系。故事告诉我们不要相信谣传，不要以貌取人。故事中OldManDonovan是一个外表可怕，其实是一个心地善良的老人。短文结构清晰，以农场中有twotreasures为线索，原文描写了第一个treasure--hisbeautifulfruit,第二个看不见的treasure，就是老人善良的内心，这是续写的重点描写内容。2.时空变化：要特别注意第二句句首提示语的时间Thenextwinter,...这就意味着第一段必须提到某一个夏天，而不是everysummer。所以，第一段应该有两个时间，第一个是每年夏天做了什么，第二个时间应该是某一个夏天发生的事。在这一点上估计会出现离题。3.续写难点：第一是主题难以把握，估计都会提到akindheart,但是最好在结尾处有不能以貌取人的感悟。第二是时间空间的转换，尤其是对thenextwinter的理解，容易跑题。第三原文中提到老人的家人对他们不友好，在续写部分应该有相关的交代(hisfamilyneverseemedtoenjoyourcompany.Theyneversmiledorwelcomedusin)。第四原文情节相对曲折，多叙述少细节描写。三、下水续写“7+7”模式Paragraph1:Everysummer,wewouldvisitMr.Donovanandtalktohim.↓1.Asalways,hewelcomeduswithopenarmsandtreatedustosomeredapples.↓2.Sometimes,heevenletusclimbupthefruittreestopicktheonesweliked.↓3.Onhisfarm,wetalkedandlaughedcheerfully,asifahiddentreasurehadbeendiscovered.↓4.Whiletalkingtohim,wegottoknowwhytherewerehorriblerumorsabouthim.↓5.Onesummermorning,however,whenwegotthere,wewereshockedtofindthathewasillandhishealthwasdecliningrapidly.↓6.Butwecouldseethejoyinhiseyes,whenevermysisterandIkepthimcompany.↓7.Sowewenttoseehimnowandthen,hopingthathewouldrecoversoon.↓Paragraph2:Thenextwinter,wordgotaroundthatOldManDonovanhaddied..↓1.Whenweheardthebadnews,asenseofgriefoverwhelmedus.↓2.Attheideaofneverseeingouroldfriendagain,westoodstill,tearsstreamingdownourcheeks.↓3.Thenwedashedtothefarm,onlytofindthatourfriendwasnowheretobeseen.↓4.Inspiteofthefactthathisfamilywerealittleunfriendly,wepluckedourcouragetogotohisfuneral.↓5.Thinkingbacktothehappymomentswespenttogether,westartedtoweepuncontrollably.↓6.Todate,werememberOldManDonovanandthelessonwelearned:↓7.Neverbelieverumors,neverjudgeapersonfromhisappearance,oryoumaymissapersonwithakindheart.Paragraph1:Everysummer,wewouldvisitMr.Donovanandtalktohim.Asalways,hewelcomeduswithopenarmsandtreatedustosomeredapples.Sometimes,heevenletusclimbupthefruittreestopicktheonesweliked.Onhisfarm,wetalkedandlaughedcheerfully,asifahiddentreasurehadbeendiscovered.Whiletalkingtohim,wegottoknowwhytherewerehorriblerumorsabouthim.Onesummermorning,however,whenwegotthere,wewereshockedtofindthathewasillandhishealthwasdecliningrapidly.Butwecouldseethejoyinhiseyes,whenevermysisterandIkepthimcompany.Sowewenttoseehimnowandthen,hopingthathewouldrecoversoon.Paragraph2:Thenextwinter,wordgotaroundthatOldManDonovanhaddied.Whenweheardthebadnews,asenseofgriefoverwhelmedus.Attheideaofneverseeingouroldfriendagain,westoodstill,tearsstreamingdownourcheeks.Thenwedashedtothefarm,onlytofindthatourfriendwasnowheretobeseen.Inspiteofthefactthathisfamilywerealittleunfriendly,wepluckedourcouragetogotohisfuneral.Thinkingbacktothehappymomentswespenttogether,westartedtoweepuncontrollably.Todate,werememberOldManDonovanandthelessonwelearned:Neverbelieverumors,neverjudgeapersonfromhisappearance,oryoumaymissapersonwithakindheart.